Every feel like you’re coasting along? Of course, I mean productively coasting along. Highly effective at work, tidy home, happy family – well, apart from the pee on the floor incident by the toddler earlier. Everything is just tickety boo right? Well, kind of. Some thing I’ve noticed is that in the pre-parenting days (ah, those heady times) I was very focused. I was very organised. I was also probably a little bit stressed if I’m honest. However, I didn’t half achieve some stuff. I had a brilliantly well paid job, did a masters degree part time, awesome social life. But perhaps looking back, it wasn’t all that rosy. The occasional random anxiety attacks (oh yes, those unexpected ones are just such a joy), lack of time to exercise (too busy eating out) and the yearning desire to have a child at the same time of saying to myself ‘is this it now that I’ve spectacularly made it?’
Clearly things were a little unbalanced back in the day – I was rather high speed with my days as was evident by the ever present knot in my stomach that I certainly do not miss.
But there was a sense of achievement. Sure, having a child and watching as they start to develop their speech is way more exciting then any job promotion. And I’m not even saying I don’t get a sense of satisfaction when I manage to actually hoover every room upstairs. Indeed my work balance is the best it has ever been. No 3 hour daily commute for me anymore – 5 mins and I am in that office ready to go.
However, I’m kind of ready to go through the motions. I’m not sure I’m seeing the world at the moment with the same sense of anticipation. Its almost like I’ve stopped noticing noticing stuff……..if that makes sense??
My daily world is a whole lot narrower than it has ever been. I see less people, I travel less miles and, most disappointingly, I drink less wine. But that doesn’t mean its any less rich because of it.
So I’m going to go back to my tried and tested methods. Yep, I’m back to what I know – on Amazon down the ‘what does it all mean’ book aisle. It’s a guilty pleasure of mine I must say and I’m about to order ‘Happiness by Design – Finding Pleasure & Purpose in everyday life” by Paul Dolan.
I’ll let you know how I get one!